season five.

LC and crew are back for a fifth season of The Hills. 

I've never seen so much raw emotion in 30 (actually 21) minutes of reality television. There were fist fights, tears, birthday parties, lies, confrontations and drunken invitations to drink and dance on a bar. 

Are LC and Heidi back? Will LC ever finish school? Was it really a surprise party? Was it really her birthday? And how about how after all the hugging and crying when asked about Heidi being at her party, LC reveals that she wasn't all that pumped up about Heidi being at her party.  

The conversations between these people remind me of sixth grade. But, it's like I'm in sixth grade watching third graders fight with second graders. It's that absurd. 

Spencer and Brody getting back together was an incredibly special moment and I don't think I've ever loved anything as much as Heidi's mother bringing the random high school flame to dinner and talking up marriage. That's a mother that loves her daughter and all the decisions she's making in her life. That's support. All mothers should take a cue from her-- when your daughter is engaged to an asshole, bring in some randy random you found on Facebook and try to re-hook up your daughter with him. Also, someone seriously needs to burst Heidi's mom's bubble and tell her that LC is not back on the Heidi train. It'll be devastating, but I think she can find another replacement on Facebook, just like she did with the boy. 

Biggest Duh: 

"It is what it is."-- Heidi in reference to her friendship with LC

Biggest Quote that was Awesome, but an Accident: 

"We're on a boat!" --LC to Audrina

Biggest is this on Repeat: 

"The person you love...I don't think he's nice." --LC to Heidi

Most Emotional Moment Ever: 

"I don't like him, but I love you. I can't be a half friend to you."--LC

"My favorite memories are my memories with you." -- Heidi

 

Family of the Year Moment:

"I am not calling you a sister any more!" --Spencer to Stephanie

I wonder if their parents will put that in the family Christmas letter?

Best Childhood Memory:

"You don't have any other friends. You don't know how to

 exist without Heidi." --Stephanie to Spencer

Most Realistic Bit of Truth from a Stranger:

"Good luck with that." -- Bartender to Heidi, on relationship with Spencer

I mean, she's a "stranger" and she's like, WTF. 

Get Serious About Your Life:

"I'm so sick of being frustrated." -- Heidi to Mom, about Spencer

Sounded a Little Bit like Court Appointed Therapy:

"It's not fair to force somebody on someone else." --LC to Stephanie

Bromance is True Love:

"We've had a little falling out. But, I still consider you a friend." --Brody to Spencer

I'm Sorry, What:

"It's bananas, homey." -- Spencer to Brody,

 about his relationship (you know, his impending marriage)

Sounds like true love. 

Worst Best Man Advice Ever

"You can't put all of your eggs in one basket."-- Brody to Spencer

I think that's exactly what you should be doing if you're getting married. Putting your eggs in one basket and leaving them there. For. Ever.